Challenge in Identity

Historical Reflection for Identity

I acknowledge many characteristics about myself and ignore many other details that make up my identity. As a male with mixed races such as Italian, Hispanic, American, among other areas of historical generations I have learned many things about my genealogy. I have tested the Ancestry website DNA study and was given a plethora of geographical locations. In regard to my identity in its simplicist form, I am male, Italian, American, Born in California, American citizen, and I am accountable for my own character.

 Challenge or privilege

To analyze challenges and privileges of my own historical nature will be directly associated with the personal decisions of my immediate ancestry. These issues are of no general assumption of all people of similar genealogy. My father had come to San Diego California with many of his relatives and they were not American Citizens. The challenge of this was considerable after I was old enough to realize that my family was not wealthy. American Citizenship would have beneficial to any career goal he may have had. My father passed away and had essentially nothing, so I grew up with very little in a small apartment. Although my recollection of this time feels uncomfortable because I am aware that if some decisions were made differently, then I could have had a different experience to recollect, but while I was there it seemed normal. There were other families in the apartments and this city of Spring Valley had many apartments in which the neighborhood children would all become friends.

The challenge of adapting

I had many challenges starting my life with only one parent. Adapting to this community as a child was simply being a child. Unaware of the difference of having two parents could have made. My mother’s family are Hispanic, and Italian. Growing up with other family friends that are also Hispanic taught me the culture in which I would soon be developing through. Hispanic gangs exist in San Diego CA, and I had intimate experience with this culture as a young Hispanic in San Diego. Members of my close relatives were deeply involved, I joyfully felt the love and support from family friends, that shared a close bond because of this association. I didn’t have a full understanding of how it all came into existence, but it was the strongest influence that I remember at that age. Growing up with two siblings, one parent, Hispanic, Italian culture, and not being wealthy had naturally developed my character in many ways that we are still learning today. The development of confidence is an important characteristic of self-identity. Due to lacking the finances necessary to afford braces, I vulnerably admit that braces would have been a pivotal point in my confidence development. The challenge was adapting into the new schools and noticing what others had due to their home financial status. Development of identity takes years. The psychological significance of development between the ages of 11 and 14 years old are delicate.

The Challenge

Due to many experiences of a challenging yet rewarding nature, I am humbled and confident in myself as one who understands accountability. Throughout the years off early teenager to teenager, then to adulthood, the most challenging detail is when my mother passed away. This was an already limited household, a culture of people and loved ones that were gone a lot because of jail/prison, and then adapting attempting to adapt with no parents at the age of 10 proved to be mostly challenging. My perspective in which privilege may be attributable to these circumstances, is I that felt none. I felt no privilege while experiencing those years and none to my recollection. I candidly admit that as I identify with myself today as accountable due to the many tragic events that have been compartmentalized thus far. My level of understanding on accountability feels very strong as I am the individual that experiences these trials, learns something from each, and can decide to be different and therefore create a different outcome. My cultural experience with the families of Hispanic DNA was exciting as a grew older and realized that any family gathering, or function will have alcohol. As a growing teenager my experience with alcohol may have been earlier than others. I identify with this culture and am fully aware that I would be able to drink alcohol at any of the families’ gatherings. Our text mentions “Group membership, including our race or ethnicity, gender, class, and sexual orientation, shape our experiences and, therefore, how we think about American society, the world, and ourselves.” (Healy and Stepnick).

This cultural behavior that generations still carry on today has many challenges. My father passed away because of alcohol, and liver failure. My development was heavily aligned with drinkers of which I personally had experienced the loss that it can create. It was normal in the culture when all of those relatives get together again, although they knew they had lost their cousin, uncle, nephew as a result of a specific behavior, it was still considered cultural norm. The development of my identity has been more separation from historical associations. The challenges experienced were not in the form of society to my race or culture, it was based on the lack of parents.

It would be important to talk about these experiences candidly an vulnerable so that a new generation of similar teenage gypsies (as myself) can understand some level of hope with accountability. Currently where I live and my profession maintains I high level of accountability, therefore It makes no difference at the moment whether I have parents or do not. If I am Italian, Hispanic, from California, and a Gypsy then society will be able to identify me to simple categories, but accountability reinforces the importance of action. My identity is many compartmentalized details, but my actions show who I am.

Conclusion

“A Habitual Behavior: Like any other task, the more we think, feel, and act confident, the easier it becomes for us to feel so for a longer duration of time.” (Turaga). Culturally with Hispanics it would be uncomfortable to talk about issues directly unless they have had an excess of alcohol. Italians may be more candid and available. These two cultures connecting to one identity, still American Citizen that speaks no other language, serve as a hurdle to overcome some of the more difficult experiences. Talking about it would have been very beneficial, if the appropriate people were available to talk to. The individuals available to me at the time were not the best option. Since I have learned from many years of this I can stand as an option for others to talk to. My level of understanding the complex emotions associated with adapting, confidence, and identity is very colorful. My level of understanding of accountability is colorful. “Accountability, however, could be understood as a behavioral process. Frink and Ferris (1998) explain accountability by emphasizing that “people are agents of their own behavior, and can be held answerable for their behaviors” (p. 1261). Identity and experience are Parallel. Confidence is the result of that combination. It would be healthy to share that everyone may come to a moment in their life when he or she realizes that no one else is to blame, but themselves. Accountability has the potential to heal the wounds of historical cultural or natural tragedies.